It's officially one day closer. One day closer until I put on that black gown. I wonder who called that thing a gown? It looks more like a freaking drape to me. and that dreading cap..don't even get me started on that cap. I can only imagine what my Afro style curls will look like under that thing. I can hardly wait..a black drape and curls coming out of a black cap. These pictures are going to haunt me for a LIFETIME.
Shouldn't I be excited about graduation. I mean don't get me wrong I am more than ready to be done with school work, but life after graduation scares me. I have procrastinated the application process because it SCARES me. What if I put out 2077363468 resumes and I don't get a single phone call back. Does that mean I have wasted the last 5 years of my life? Does that mean I've wasted $20,000 in student loans? Makes me want to vomit.
When I was young it was never an option to not go to college. It was just simply life after High School. I wish I never what to do life after college. Why can't my Nona (the name I have given my mother) just find me a job and send me on my way? That would make life SO much easier. I keep telling myself after I get through all this school work that has to be done I will have time to get aggresive about job searching, but then it will be too LATE!
Monday, April 26, 2010
Sunday, April 25, 2010
Where did I get 10 days from?
I obviously have lost my mind. Graduation is NOT ten days away more like 14 days. I have no brain left.
Today I have spent my day on this computer. Why you might ask? DOING HOMEWORK. I am sick of homeowrk I am sick of school. I quit! HOnestly I do. I'm over this college thing. Is it sad that I am already dreading waking up in the morning? I can hear the alarm going off now and I think I'm going to vomit.
I have been a complete slacker this weekend. I have two lesson reflections that need to be put on CHalk and Wire, I have ETEC crap I need to finish, and I have a proposal to write for English. (Have I mentioned that I hate my life?) I'm still kicking myself in the butt for waiting until my LAST semester to take ETEC and COMP 2..What was I thinking? Oh, I know what I was thinking! Those were the days...Staying up late with my roomates. Going to La Huerta every Tuesday for Margaritas, Party on the Patio on Thursday's. Now I know why I waited so long.
I want a time machine..to take me from this computer..In fact take me where there are NO computers.
Today I have spent my day on this computer. Why you might ask? DOING HOMEWORK. I am sick of homeowrk I am sick of school. I quit! HOnestly I do. I'm over this college thing. Is it sad that I am already dreading waking up in the morning? I can hear the alarm going off now and I think I'm going to vomit.
I have been a complete slacker this weekend. I have two lesson reflections that need to be put on CHalk and Wire, I have ETEC crap I need to finish, and I have a proposal to write for English. (Have I mentioned that I hate my life?) I'm still kicking myself in the butt for waiting until my LAST semester to take ETEC and COMP 2..What was I thinking? Oh, I know what I was thinking! Those were the days...Staying up late with my roomates. Going to La Huerta every Tuesday for Margaritas, Party on the Patio on Thursday's. Now I know why I waited so long.
I want a time machine..to take me from this computer..In fact take me where there are NO computers.
Saturday, April 24, 2010
10 Days and Counting!
This has possibly been the longest semester of my life. I've never been more ready to be DONE with something in my life!
For the last two weeks I have been working on my professional portfolio, which is full of educational stuff that BETTER get me a job. My portfolio sure could be better but let's keep our fingers crossed. I am still trying to grasp the concept that I am actually graduating from college and I have NOTHING planned for the future. When I decided to be a teacher five years ago I wish someone would have told me it's practically impossible to get a job. What do I have do to sell a kidney to teach kids? I mean really? It's a little ridiculous, don't you think? Before my internship this year, I thought good teaching was just loving kids. Boy was I wrong! I think teaching is the hardest profession I could have ever picked. I leave work thinking about my students and the next lesson I am planning to teach them. I think about them more than I think about myself!
It makes me sick to my stomach to think that this could be my last week to teach kids for a very long time. There is an excessive amount of qualified teacher who would make great teachers...How will I match up to them? If I don't get a job before next school year, I don't know what I will do with myself. Who will I worry about? What will I do? I guess get a dog? Can I just go back five years ago when I had no worries?
For the last two weeks I have been working on my professional portfolio, which is full of educational stuff that BETTER get me a job. My portfolio sure could be better but let's keep our fingers crossed. I am still trying to grasp the concept that I am actually graduating from college and I have NOTHING planned for the future. When I decided to be a teacher five years ago I wish someone would have told me it's practically impossible to get a job. What do I have do to sell a kidney to teach kids? I mean really? It's a little ridiculous, don't you think? Before my internship this year, I thought good teaching was just loving kids. Boy was I wrong! I think teaching is the hardest profession I could have ever picked. I leave work thinking about my students and the next lesson I am planning to teach them. I think about them more than I think about myself!
It makes me sick to my stomach to think that this could be my last week to teach kids for a very long time. There is an excessive amount of qualified teacher who would make great teachers...How will I match up to them? If I don't get a job before next school year, I don't know what I will do with myself. Who will I worry about? What will I do? I guess get a dog? Can I just go back five years ago when I had no worries?
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